Erudite's Mind
by Momo Aathara
Summary: The Divergent story told from the perspective of a member of the Erudite faction, Maria. I am writing this story with Annalice999, and she is writing her own version of the story from her character, Ariya's, perspective. Ariya will be the only character who couldn't have existed if we were following the book to a T. It is meant to give a backround on some of the other characters


My mother used to tell me stories about how Erudite used to be, before Jeanine took over the faction, before our knowledge was planned for us, before the image of Erudite faded into something I no longer recognize. My home has changed from a cerulean blue to almost black.

It wasn't always like this. There was a time when Erudite was a place for people who just wanted to learn. People flooded to the libraries to read amazing stories that took them to places that they couldn't even imagine. People learned for understanding and enjoyment, not for power like some were doing now.

Jeanine started us on this path, the path of power and suffering. No, it is not so much a path as it is a never-ending pit that most of Erudite has fallen into. I, on the other hand, am standing with my mother on the edge of the pit wondering what could have compelled the rest to jump in.

"Maria!"

I glanced up at the sound of my name and the world came splashing back into view. And by splashing, I _mean_ splashing; I was soaked.

"Ariya!" I shouted as I caught a glimpse of my friend's caramel colored hair exploding out of the river, causing another shower of water droplets to hit me in the face.

"Hey, Mari," she greeted pleasantly as if she hadn't just drenched me.

"You sure know how to make an entrance." I glared at her as I attempted to wring out a fraction of the water embedded in my hair.

"Yep," she agreed, plopping down beside me and shaking out her short, caramel brown hair sending another wave of water shooting at me.

I groaned inwardly and whipped them out of my eyes.

"You nervous?' she asked, glancing up at the sky with an expression I couldn't read.

I hesitated to answer. She knew I wasn't nervous; she knew that no matter how much Erudite changed I still belonged here, but then why would she ask? Unless she was nervous, but that was impossible; Ariya was never nervous. Even imagining her nervous was impossible, but she was still…

I glanced over at her, but her gaze hadn't shifted. "A little," I finally answered. "You?"

She looked over at me and smiled. "I guess I'll find out if I need to be tomorrow, won't I?"

She was nervous! Her usual easy confidence and honesty; had all but evaporated, replaced by confusion and, not fear, but just subtle nervousness about a day that I always thought would end like any other.

"Do you think you'll get something other than Erudite?" I whispered, not wanting to hear the answer.

Her smile disappeared and she looked at the ground; it wasn't like she had to answer.

I could already see my best friend wearing the blacks and purples of Dauntless, jumping on and off trains, and running through the halls, pumping her fists and cheering. We had both talked about what it would be like to live in other factions; I still remember the excitement in her eyes when she talked about Dauntless.

"So you're leaving," I murmured, the sadness starting to build up in my eyes.

"I don't know."

I closed my eyes and tried to drown out the thoughts racing through my head. My tears were threatening to escape from my eyes, and even though Ariya had seen me cry, and knew that I cried easily I still didn't want her to see, so I just sat there.

"I'm sorry," she murmured.

I didn't respond; I couldn't respond. If I had all that would have come out would have been an unintelligible choking, sobbing noise, so I said nothing.

After a bit of hesitation, I heard her walk away.

I should have said something, but what could I say? Please don't go; you're my best friend! Don't be so selfish; put my happiness above your own. How could you leave me?

Be happy. Have fun. I'll miss you.

I buried my face in my hands. I could have said that; I could have comforted her instead of making her feel worse about leaving, or wanting to.

"Maria?"

For a second I thought Ariya had come back, but no, this voice was distinctly male.

I peeked over the tips of my fingers across the river to where the voice had come from. I didn't have to find his face before I knew who it was.

I gave him a small, fake smile when our matching dark blue eyes met, but then dived back into the safety of my hands.

He was concerned; I could tell by the way his eyes that I couldn't see still managed to penetrate my shield. Then there was the quiet splashing of someone crossing the river and a hand on my head brushing my shoulder-length black hair comfortingly in a way that was so familiar and so sad.

"It's alright," he whispered. "What happened?"

"It's happening again," I whispered so quietly that I couldn't even hear it.

"What?"

I looked up at him and saw that his head was in his usual sad, worried position. His head was angled slightly to the right in a way that made his light brown hair frame his face perfectly, his eyes were wide with concern, and his mouth was slightly agar.

Seeing him like that made me instantly regret what I had just said.

It wasn't Zane's fault that he felt more at home in Amity than in Erudite; it wasn't his fault that I had lost my brother and friend when I was 14. I thought I had gotten over his decision a long time ago, but now Ariya was possibly leaving, and I didn't know if I could take it a second time.

"I'm just nervous about the Choosing Ceremony," I lied unconvincingly. Usually I'm a fairly decent liar, but I just couldn't bring myself to put forth the effort.

"You can tell me," he said quietly, his Amity side shining through; he really does belong there.

I turned and buried my face in his chest, finally letting my tears flow freely; it felt good to let them out. "Everyone's leaving me," I finally choked out, but I instantly regretted it when Zane flinched.

"Not you," I corrected, breaking away from his warm embrace. He was trying to hide how much my statement had hurt him, but neither of us were very good at masking our emotions. "I didn't mean you."

Zane gave me a small smile. "It's alright," he whispered. "I understand."

The wonderful thing about Zane was that he did, he completely understood what I meant and he always knew what I really needed every time I was upset. He stood up and helped me to my feet. "You should go home and talk to mom," he told me as he hugged me gently and brushed away the thin strands of black hair that had fallen over my eye.

I nodded and Zane smiled at me before crossing back to the Amity side of the river to a blond girl with light blue eyes and hair cut slightly longer than mine.

I blushed; had she been there the whole time?

She smiled at me kindly when Zane reached her, and I felt myself smiling back at the warmth of her gaze. I waved at the two of them before hurrying towards home with the smallest hint of a smile still on my face. Zane had done what had seemed impossible a few minutes ago; he had made me feel better.

…

"I'm home!" I called into my lit, but eerily quiet house. I walked in, shutting the door softly behind me and calling again, "Hello?"

"For god's sake, child, be quiet!"

I cringed as my father's sharp voice rang out around the house. "Sorry," I whispered before hurrying upstairs to my room.

My dad had changed so much in the years that Jeanine had been in charge, just like the rest of Erudite. He practically worshiped her now, like she was the god of Erudite or something, and she stood for everything our faction stood for. Yeah, right. He was probably re-reading her biography again. Maybe he thought it would reveal more secrets on how to live a perfect Erudite life.

I collapsed on my bed and closed my eyes so I could think.

Everything had been going from bad to worse ever since Jeanine showed up a little over two years ago. Zane had left, the Erudite lifestyle had drastically changed, my father had become a loyal zombie to Jeanine, and now Ariya was leaving.

I blinked, the sadness coming back to my eyes in waves.

_Stop it._ I scolded myself. I couldn't cry over it again. If Ariya was happy, I could be happy for her. With that thought in mind, I pulled out a book from the rows of shelving that lined my walls and focused my attention on enriching myself in the story instead of what was actually going on around me like I usually did when I was upset.

At exactly 10:30 I closed my book, turned off the light in my room, and slept.

…

I dreamed of Ariya that night. I dreamed of her jumping on trains, running, and shouting with the biggest smile on her face. I was looking over at her, but I couldn't tell how I felt about it. It really didn't matter, however, that the dream was unclear; I already know how I feel about her leaving.

Be happy. Have fun. I'll miss you.

The words I should have said yesterday flashed through my mind and I promised myself that I would tell her today.

"Maria! Get up!" my dad shouted as I was combing my hair.

"I am up!" I hadn't meant to sound harsh, but I guess it came across that way because when I came downstairs he was waiting at the bottom. His eyes were dark and cold; they were always dark and cold.

"I don't want any of your attitude today, child," he snapped, his eyes narrowed.

That was my name whenever I was home, child. He thought that I was so far beneath him that I wasn't even deserving of a real name.

"Where's mom?" I asked, glancing over his shoulder and into the kitchen. Mom was usually in there making breakfast around this time.

"She's at the school, remember?" he answered, rolling his eyes at my stupidity. I could practically hear his thoughts. _Call yourself a Erudite and you don't even know this simple stuff. You're pathetic, child._

"Right, sorry," I replied. I kept my eyes down as I squeezed past him into the kitchen. I forgot that mom was running one of the Abnegation test rooms today. She runs one every other year since Abnegation aren't allowed to run tests for members of their own faction. I don't see how it matters, but I don't make the rules.

I ate my food rather quickly, which probably wasn't the best idea since I already had butterflies in my stomach, but I had to get away from my dad. He was always unpleasant, but in the morning it was ten times worse. Usually mom was here to keep him tolerable, but not today, not on the day when I needed her the most.

In less than 15 minutes, I was out the door; I didn't even say goodbye to him. There was no point anymore.

…

I waited for Ariya in an indent in the wall of the hallway where we sometimes stopped to talk between classes during the day. I watched as members of each faction walked to their respective classes in groups that only ever contained members of one faction. They made it seem like it was illegal to be friends with someone from a different faction, but that was nothing compared to Abnegation who made it seem like it was illegal to have friends at all.

They still didn't deserve this though. My eyes narrowed as one of the Erudite students in my year shoved a blond Abnegation girl down with a snap of, "Out of my way, Stiff." A few people around her stop, but no one makes a move to help her. I want to, but she's all the way across the hall, and I can't stand it when people stare at me.

_I'm such a coward._ I hate this aspect of myself; I'm never brave enough to do anything. I wish Ariya had been here; she wouldn't have even hesitated to knock that Erudite boy on his butt. Where was she anyway? I glanced at the clock nearby and jumped in alarm; I had less than a minute to get to Advanced Math. I clutched my books closer and hurried through the crowd.

I slipped into my seat in the back of the room just as the bell rang. Ariya and I had the class together, but we sat on opposite ends of the room. It seems like it would have made more sense for me to talk to her in the classroom, but usually one of us got there late, and our teacher was very strict about no talking in his class even before class had started.

I scanned the room, taking in all of the students that were already seated. Most of the class was Erudite, but there were a few Candor and Amity students and one Abnegation boy. Ariya was already in her seat on the other side of the room; her eyes flicked away from me when I looked over at her.

_She must be mad at me._ I thought miserably. I stared down at my desk the entire period, ignoring the teacher's speech about how much he expected of us.

When the bell rang, Ariya was gone before I even had a chance to stand. I blinked at the door sadly, slowly picked up my stuff, and headed towards my next class.

The rest of the morning went by in a blur. All of the teachers said the same thing: that they hoped that we would grow into the adults that they knew we could be. It got very boring very fast; however, I would have sat through a billion of those speeches if it meant I didn't have to go to the Choosing Ceremony that afternoon, but my wish was not granted.

I sat in the cafeteria with all of the other students who were seated with their factions at the long tables where I had been eating lunch for 11 years. Across from me were a set of twins, Karli and Aaron Andres, who were discussing the different customs of each of the factions. Sitting on my sides were two boys named Matt Wilson and Anthony Wyther, who was the first one to go.

A wrung my hands nervously as he was called in along with Aaron; why did I have to be tested so close to the beginning?

"From Erudite: Karli Andres and Maria White," a voice called minutes later right after Aaron and Anthony had sat back down, neither of them looking phased at all.

I cringed and slowly rose to my feet. I angled my head down so my hair formed a curtain, and headed towards the room. I had been so sure yesterday that I belonged in Erudite, but what if I was wrong? What if I got a different faction?

I hesitated just before I entered the room and looked back at the room of students just waiting to be tested. Somehow my eyes found Ariya's.

She gave me a small smile, and it felt like a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. I smiled back, turned around, took a deep breath, and with newly restored confidence, walked into the choosing room.

…

**Thanks for reading the first chapter of my Divergent story! Annalice999 is writing the story from her character, Ariya's perspective, although she doesn't have her fist chapter up yet… Hopefully posting my chapter will help her to motivate herself to write her chapter. Well, we'll see. I hope you enjoyed the chapter, please review. 8D**


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